Thoughts In Question??

Is life really this easy or is it just that hard? Live like each and every day is your last so when it is your time you won't be cheated. That is what an older person told me, I thought about it and it sounds like damn good advice. So now if I could just get my emotions together I might just be saying something. I don't know anybody that has conquered this feeling of being in love and the loss of it. That is one hell of a feeling, its one of self destruction. It feels like your heart is burning and the world is ending. Like the all the buildings are all falling around you. like your drowning under water but you won't die. Can anyone show me how to get around this feeling? Is there anyone out there that has what it takes to teach how to help a broken heart?

The rage inside helps me deal with everyday life. I think life owes me a lot and I'm going to get it by any means necessary. The pain of my father not being here forces me to inflict pain to others. I don't know why I feel good making other people feel bad. One can explain it or maybe they can I just don't want to hear it. I'm any persons night mare young fucked up and I just don't care. Everybody is going to pay for what my parents didn't do for me. The love I didn't have the stable home I wish I had. Don't tell me I'm wrong I'm so tired of hearing that shit. I don't sell crack for the money, I sell it because of what its probably doing to someone's home. My parents weren't there so why should this kid's parents be there? Yeah I know, fucked up right? Well I'm just being honest, that's more than most can say for themselves. I'm laying here dying, shot 5 times in my chest for cutting some ones father for shorting me on some money.. Will I pray for forgiveness before I slip away to whereever the dead go? No because I need who's ever in charge where I'm going to know I still don't give a fuck..

Sounds of a baby coming out of that room. I am the proudest father in this world. Well not exactly the biologic father, but he's mine. Yes, she was with some one else. When he found out she was pregnant he left and said it wasn't his. Well with all the love I have for her I'm glad to accept her and him as my family. I promised her and her parents that I would always take care of her and the baby.. Home from the hospital, she had a C-Section, so I had to take off from work to help her out.. Sweetheart do you need anything? She's always so quiet and looking lost in her thoughts.. I think she's still hung up on him and what he's doing.. 3 months later, she's healthy now and moving around. She leaves my with little Cory and goes out often not coming home until 3 or 4 in the morning. Now I'm in love with her but to the point that I'm blind to the world. I had her change Cory's name to my last name because I saw that she was going to have to be let go and he's staying with me. One night when she said her and the girls was going out I decided to follow her. Low and behold she jumped in the front seat of a man's truck and kissed him long and passionately on the lips. Me having my camera I took pictures of it all even his plates. So when she came home that night I put the pictures all around the house so she could see. In the bathroom, in the kitchen, in our room. When she notice they was all over. She started packing slowly and not saying a word. So when she started getting Cory ready I kindly asked her to leave my son here. She started with that oh he's not your son mess. I said he has my last name and you have to go to court to take him and you don't want him now anyway. So this is what's going to happen. Right now your going to leave us alone and when you want to you can come see him. She started to put up a fight and then I guess she realized that she really didn't want to be a mother right now anyway, so she gathered her things and left without even kissing our child..

Can we control our emotions in certain situations?? I don't think we will ever have full control but what can be done is we can change the way we look at things..

-MOEDON-
dont get mad get money..